Wasting time with Jet

After posting the chicken pic yesterday morning (I know it said 10:30 PM, it was really am, I screwed up!). I went to the AMC to see "Mindhunters". An incident while seeing the last Highlander movie (Which sucked) forced me to boycott this theater, but sometimes I go to see rare indie films, anime, or movies that'll been out over 2 months and are gone everywhere else.

So, I get my ticket and realize "Mindhunters" is theater 24 (of 25) which is all the way up on the top floor (Six stories, I think). What happened next made my whole Memorial Day Weekend! Ya see the ticket ushers are on the 2nd floor ONLY, so the further up you are, the more movies you can sneak into on EACH FLOOR!!! I saw "Mindhunters", "Crash", "Episode III", "Monster-In-Law", AND "Layer Cake" for the price of one ticket! After each movie, I just went one flight down and checked to see which movie was about to start in another theater! It's the called the "Domino Effect", you never get caught, just look like you're going to the next movie...They may have cameras and ushers, but they'll never catch this theater-hopping rabbit!

I get home at around 11:30 at night, and who do I see but my sister....
"Whadda doing Here?" I asked. I checked for new bruses or any sign she's still with that asshole that's beating her...

First thing outta her mouth, No "Hey", "What's Up", or "How YOU doing?"..."Can you make me a copy of Mariah Carey's CD?" This girl's a peice of work. "I could get her latest one off the internet..." I began, she interrupts "No, No, I got that from someone already, and it's making wanna listen to her first album, can you make it?" I was like, WHAT?!?!...Hell no, "Go to Tower Records and get it for 7.99, fool!" I yelled. Then mom walks in from the bedroom. Now, it's 11:30, AT NIGHT, mom is usually dead to the world sleep by now...

So, I'm thinking "Everybody's here, somebody died or some crazy shit!". Then my mom explains...

"She's here becuase she doesn't want me to go to her house, tonight."

I'm like, "HUH!?!"

"I was going to ruin her weekend fun by spending the night at her house and see if this nigga still smacking her up." mom explains further.

I finally get her plan and elaborate, "So you were going to just show up at her house at 10 at night without thinking who would be there? Could you BE any more suicidal MOM?!?!" I hollar.

My sister sucks her teeth and says "Shut up" and mom laughs.

"Her stupid ass friends ain't gonna do nothing to me!" mom says.

I look at my sister who looks like she wants to home, but thinks mom will go right behind her so she's waiting her out...

"So YOU came over to prevent mom from going to your place..." I concluded.

"BUT how'd you even find out about mom's plan?" I asked no one in particullar, the answer then waltzed in the living room to join us...

"Hiyeee Uncle!!!"

My little niece, she can be such a monkey wrench.

So, Mom's threating to follow my sister home just to see whose over at her place and natually my sister's having a shit fit.

Me having seeing five movies straight and not moving my bowels, I left them to their mexican standoff to answer nature's call...

Mom and my niece went to bed at 1am, my sister asked me for 20 bucks so she could take a can home, I gave her unlimited metrocard which was going to expire at the end of may, she threw it back in my face and stormed out. Which was a good thing, I later realized considering the 31st was a tuesday and I had to go back to work.

Mom swears she's going to crash my sister's house party one of these weekends, but I know well enough not to hold my breath.

Here's to the all the soldiers out there that fight to let our dysfunctional families make us miserable freely.

God bless America.