Wasting time with Jet

Chirs Gardner got Nuttin' on ME!

Let me stop, In that movie "Pursuit of Happyness" Will Smith (Gardner) went though hell.

But damnit, I came close today!

With the hair on my face growing at "Lunberjack" speed, I needed a good shave and jus a shape up today for my Interview for Hudson Health Plan up in Tarrytown.

Naturally I sought my Less-than-reliable Barber, Jalu who STILL was nowhere to be found (Damn, I hope that nigga ain't dead somewhere...). So I roam around the neighborhood remembering there was a new barber shop that opened SOMEwhere.

I found it at 11am. Now keep in mind, my interview was at 2pm...

I asked how much for a shave and a shape up, he says 12 bucks, which is exactly how much I had so I couldn't tip him, so I turn around and go to the nearest bank to get a twenty from an ATM and get back there in time that he took me next. If there was someone else in that damn chair when I came back it was gonna be ON!

Anyways, I sit down, it's 11:07 now...this guy goes into "Al Capone" mode giving me a shave with the clippers, the scissors, and the gaddamn SWITCHBLADE, then he leans me back and give me a hot-towel shave...by 11:30, I told him I had to BE somewhere, and then he finally finishes up. He gives me his card and says he's open from 9am, which is good to know NEXT time...I decide to keep his card and consider give Jalu the Heave-Ho.

I get back home at 11:45, fish out my new slacks I brought two weekends ago, the dress shirt and as mom LOVES the point out, the 90$ Polo Sweater Vest. I get decked out and check the news at 12 noon see if there's any traffic headaches up in westchester...

I get my paperwork ready, old paystubs to prove salary, my last job description, etc, etc....when suddenly I realize...I have no updated copy of my RESUME! Stepping carefully making sure I get no cat hair on me, I put a comforter on my bed and reach across to the computer (The PC's on the left side on my bed, comes in handy sometimes *wink*) and punch up Microsoft Word and print 4 copies of my resume. My printer clicks alive and starts going APE-SHIT! It's sucking in page after page and printing gibberish!

I try canceling the print job, it keeps going...I take the paper out so it doesn't waste anymore, I unplug the damn machine, the damn queue takes forever to clear the job. Time is ticking by as I do this and I just start loosing it!

In despration, I go to the living room and try to print my resume there, the damn PC only had POWERPOINT installed and not Word, AGGGHHH! I calm myself and go back to my computer, restart the printer and do a test print of my resume, it comes out normal and I print three more.

Finally getting ready to walk out the door by 12:45, I take one last minute to check the Bee-Line Bus Schedule for the bus that would get me to Tarrytown...

There were only TWO possible buses...

One leaving at 12:50pm that would have got me there by 1:50

The other leaves at 1:10...but that would have me arrive by 2:04 (According to the schedule!)

I groaned, I still needed to take the 1 train north to the LAST stop jus to get to the bus...I didn't have a prayer.

But I run out anyway, I'm zooming down the street and crossing with no disregard for lights thinking a car gonna hit me and knock off my shoe like Will Smith...

I finally get on the train...

NOW I remember the station...the staircase to bus stop is all the way at the end, so I need to move to back of the train.

While on the train, I take time to fill out the application they emailed me...

By the time I get to the last stop everything was cool...

Till I realized I was at the WRONG end of the station! When you arrive the train pulls in and the FIRST car is at the stairwell, the LAST car is when you're going back downtown...I got the whole thing backwards!

I ran down the platform length, to the staircase leading down to the sidewalk (all the tracks there are elevated) and what should I see pulling away from the distance, but the 1:10 Bus...

I looked on the schedule posted, the next possible bus would not come until 1:50pm, and bus had a "T" next to it so I wasn't really sure if it would really take me all the way...

I was devastated.

I thought about a cab, but I didn't take that much from the bank. (jus a twenty).

"You know, I didn't WANT this damn job, anyway..." I thought, but still...

I started calling my contact on my cell...no answer...

"Wanna bet she's on lunch?" I thought, so then I decided to leave a message explaining my situation...

at 1:48, the next bus was about to pull up, there was actually a crowd forming...

My cell rang and it was her returning my call...

After moments of apologetic statements she decides to reschedule to WEDNESDAY at 2pm and I thank her graciously, by the time the 1:50 arrived, I was climbing the steps back up to the train to go home!

Once again on the last car...I realize I was by myself and I got an idea. My dress shirt could use a nice cleaning. So I tucked into my coat, underneath the 90$ Sweater Vest and started unbuttoning my shirt...

A few stops down people started coming in so the rest of my david blaine magic trick had to wait. When I got back to my neighborhood it was 2:15, I walked to my reliable dry cleaners and asked the lady if I dropped off a shirt today, would it be ready by Wednesday morning?, she said yes...so then I asked her to turn around for a second and finished taking off my dress shirt while keeping my coat and sweater vest on! I must of looked like a maniac to her, but she was cool about it.

I come back home at 2:30, take off my coat and seeing myself wearing the 90$ sweater vest I think I look like Stone Cold Steve Austin or some other wrestler or sort.

I carefully avoid the cats again and gingerly take everything off nice and neat and prepare to try this again in about 43 hours from now.

I couldn't resist the urge to go online for a half hour and convey my adventure to "Leeloo", we got a good laugh about it and I started feeling better (She has that effect on me...).

I signed off at 3pm to get some sleep. I should be able to function tonight with no problem.

Tomorrow (Tuesday) I'm registering at some temp agency with some promise of a scanning position. It seems like the same crap I've been doing with IPS, On Call Assignments with no perm. position in sight. We'll see how that goes.